Football Virgin

So it’s been 2 years since I met my now fiancé. How sweet, innocent and naive I was. Not in the ways of dating or men (I was 33 for goodness sake) but in the ways of dating men obsessed with sport. I come from a family that has little or no interest in sport. My dad was never into football so never transferred his sportiness onto his two girls. So other than going to pub to watch football with my mates (world cups only), a weird weekend in Leeds to see them play with an ex and the few times I went to Wembley with work I hadn’t had much to do with football. I was in for a crash course it seems.

So our first date went really well and although football was mentioned it was generally in passing. I had no idea of just how big of a sports fan the man of my dreams was! It was inevitable that we would see each other again and we arranged to meet again the next night.


We met at his house and after a few cups of tea and some nervous chatter, things were going well. We started talking about twitter which we were both users off and he went onto to his twitter feed to show me something. This is when things got very very weird. The exchange went something like this:


Him: oh my F****** god!!! No F****** way!!

Me: what?? What’s ups?

Him: I don’t actually F****** believe it, it can’t be F****** true!

Me: What?

Him: Hang on a minute…(scroll, scroll, read, read). Well apparently it is true! F****** traitor. Arghhhhhh I’m going to be so angry!

Me: ……….(shell shocked, slightly scared silence)

Him: Well thats it! Oh my god, I don’t believe it!!!!

Me: Shall I leave??

Him: This is ridiculous! Seriously going to be fuming if this is true!

Me: is this about your brother, mum, dad?

Him: do you mind if I just put on sky sports news? (actually thinking about it now, I don’t think he actually asked)

Me: ummm, maybe I should go?

Him: (standing over the TV, remote in hand) Can you believe this, apparently this is true……….UNBELIEVEABLE. For F**** Sake

Me: What? What is going on (notice lack of swearing, I was still behaving like a lady)?

Him: RVP is only going to Man U F****** nited!!!

Me: Errr who’s RVP???


So this was my introduction to the crazy world of football and the transfer window. We’ve been through 4 of them now as a couple and I’ve become fluent in the twitter rumour mill, sky sports news, the mad newspaper speculation and the deadline day. I mostly ignore it all, but it’s amazing how much of it subconsciously seeps in. So much so that I can pretty much hold my own in a football conversation (limited of course), I know most of the players in the big teams and I have done the Emirates tour (and sort of enjoyed it).


I can also use my knowledge and titbits that I’ve picked up against the fiancé, but more about that another time………








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